SUNDAY, MAY 9, 2021, 10:00 AM - ONLINE ONLY
Peace with Others Series
SORRY, NOT SORRY Accepting responsibility & true apologies
Proverbs 28:13, 2 Corinthians 7:9-10, 1 John 1:8
We continue personal peacemaking in our Peace with Others Series by revealing the rarest speech in North America—true apology. People know how to judge and cancel but to apologize and move into conciliation? That is rare. This is the speech of a beloved community Dr. Martin Luther King believed was necessary for all to have freedom. We need Jesus’ teaching and Spirit at work. Join us as we look at accepting responsibility.
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Narrative Lectionary for Week of May 9
Key Texts: Proverbs 28:13, 2 Corinthians 7:9-10, 1 John 1:8
REVIEW OF THE FOUR “G”S
WHAT ABOUT MY RIGHTS?
One must realize that God sometimes calls us to give up our rights for a bigger kingdom purpose. In the Kingdom, rights are privileges.
REPENTANCE AND CONFESSION
"Worldly sorrow means feeling sad because you got caught doing something wrong or because you must suffer unpleasant consequences of your actions, such as a financial loss, a broken marriage, a damaged reputation, or nagging guilt. ANY normal person will feel regretful when faced with these unpleasant circumstances. Before long, however, worldly sorrow dies away, and most people begin to behave just as they did before...the simply try harder not to get
caught again" (Sande, Peacemaker, 118).
SEVEN “A”S OF A GOOD APOLOGY
QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND DISCUSSION
(From Resolving Everyday Conflict Participant Guide)
One of the purposes of making an effective apology is to model how you would like the other person to respond in regard to his or her contribution to the conflict.
Address Everyone Involved: Why do you think it's important to address the concerns of everyone who may have been impacted by your words and actions? What are some common reasons to avoid doing this?
Avoid “ifs” and “buts”: Why does qualifying or blame-shifting always discredit the apologies in which they are wrapped?
Admit Specifically: Why do blanket apologies seem to water down an offender’s admission? What can people avoid (or deny later) by not being specific? Why do you think it is important to clearly identify what was actually said or done when it comes to confession?
Acknowledge the Hurt: What tends to happen to a person’s level of defensiveness when he or she hears an acknowledgment of the losses that person has suffered caused by the conflict?
Accept the Consequences: Why does restitution, even when it's just symbolic, have a such a powerful effect on someone who’s been hurt?
Alter (Change) Your Behavior: Why is reconciliation dependent upon a high confidence that the conflict-provoking behaviors are not going to be repeated?
Ask for Forgiveness: Why do all the previous steps “set the stage” for reconciliation?
Is there someone with whom you can go through these steps this week? If so, call that person and set up a time to meet.